Maybe I've always been more comfortable in chaos
by redpurpleblack
Summary: Two short drabbles. Written for the "send me a word and I will write a drabble" thing on tumblr. Sampernia; full summary and warnings inside
1. Lalochezia

Title: _Maybe I've always been more comfortable in chaos_

Fandom: _Dragon Age_

Characters/Pairings: Calpernia, Samson; Sampernia

Rating: T

Warnings: references to past abuse; swearing in Latin?

Summary: Two short drabbles previously published on my tumblr.

Disclaimer: _Dragon Age_ is not mine, although the writing certainly is.

A/N: title from _St. Jude_ by Florence And The Machine.

Written for the "send me a word and I will write a drabble" thing on tumblr.

* * *

 _lalochezia_ – the use of abusive language to relieve stress or ease pain.

* * *

Samson pushes the door open and walks in without knocking, naively believing it's wise to come to Calpernia's chamber uninvited. Perhaps he hopes he has earned this privilege already.

He soon learns it's not the best idea.

"Kaffas!"

She has a letter in her hands visibly trembling with anger that is also very clearly painted on her face. Magic accumulated in this room is suffocating, and his fingers twitch as Samson remembers years of his templar training.

Next time he will knock...

"Fututus et mori in igni!"

The paper she holds bursts into flames, turning to ashes in seconds. Closing the door behind him seems like a big mistake now, although there is something oddly satisfying in seeing Calpernia's ire focused on someone else this time.

"I guess I'll leave you alone, then..." he mumbles, ready to duck if she starts throwing spells, or run with his metaphorical tail between his legs if she gives him enough time. She doesn't; Calpernia turns to face him, and Samson knows is too late now.

She walks to him, anger radiating from her is almost palpable. He can feel his blood freeze as he stands, petrified, and she pokes his chest with her index finger.

"Where do you think you're going?!"

Samson is suddenly reminded of that one time he and other recruits got massively drunk, the next day they all had to go to Knight – Commander's office. Never in his life was he so terrified of a woman, and Meredith only _glared_ at him, her cold eyes promising excruciating pain and suffering his silly little mind couldn't possibly comprehend.

"I think you want to be alone," Samson begins, half wondering if this is the day he dies in flames, screaming.

"You _think_?" she growls, adding something in her native language. He doesn't understand Tevene much (thankfully?), but he knows the word she just called him is not a term of endearment.

It doesn't matter that Calpernia is a skinny girl or that she has to stand on her tiptoes so their eyes are on the same level. Samson is quite sure she is more dangerous than the Elder One's dragon.

He will definitely knock next time. If he survives today, that is.

* * *

A/N2: _Fututus et mori in igni_ – "fuck off and die in a fire" tho I'm not 100% sure, I just found this list of swearwords in Latin, and thought _hey, I could use this?_


	2. Brontide

_brontide_ – the low rumbling of distant thunder.

* * *

Her bare feet make the slightest noise as she pads across the room to the window, flames in the fireplace crackling as if to greet her. It's comforting in a way Calpernia doesn't fully understand; it comes from her magic, and the mere sight of flames always makes her calmer. Thunders outside are so loud she can feel them in her stomach, and she vaguely wonders if the whole place will crumble down. All this noise isn't loud enough, however, to silence the storm of thoughts in her head.

She's wide awake in the middle of the night, remembering past memories she wishes she could shatter and forget.

" _What is your name?" Erasthenes asked, truly noticing her for the first time since he bought her. She trembled hearing irritation in his voice, because it meant she would be punished for daring to speak to her master, for all the books she read, for the flames that appeared in her hands._

" _Calpernia," she choked, her fingertips tingling with power she couldn't understand._

" _Calpernia?" he repeated with confusion, his words accompanied by a partially muffled rumbling of distant thunder. If she displeased him, she was certain she would spend the rest of the day chained outside, shivering in the cold rain. "Are you sure?"_

 _She nodded, magic waking up inside her, warm. She had to be sure or else she would disappear._

It happened long time ago, now it seems like a memory that belongs to someone else. Sometimes Calpernia likes to pretend she wasn't that sad little girl once. Hearing a noise, she glances over to find Samson waking up. It always looks more or less the same, his fists clenching, whole body tense, before his eyes open wide. He's like a man who's about to drown. Perhaps he dreams of drowning in a scarlet sea.

He lets out a sigh, then his eyes focus on her, filled with something distressingly close to adoration. And she still can't quite decipher how she feels about it. It's so easy, being angry at him. But she can't hide behind her anger forever, can she?

"Calpernia."

The way he says her name is so incredibly different from what she hears from others, she may almost believe Samson calls her by some other name, reserved only for him. There's great magic in names, she knows. His voice is rough, oddly similar to the thunder she can hear outside.

Calpernia looks at the flames again. Something builds low in her throat, impatient and famished. She won't let herself succumb to this feeling (not yet).


End file.
